Stephanie’s Adventures in Singledom: Men’s Epic Fails

BY STEPHANIE DOLCE

Sorry guys, but sometimes you really are pathetic. Sending your mixed signals, changing your mind more times than I change my bra, and just being completely idiotic with playing games. But the good news is, us women still love you, flaws and all.  Here are a handful of things that you guys may not even notice that you are doing which in turn are ruining your relationships.

Not Planning Things

The first epic fail is that you guys always assume that the woman is the one to make the plans. So while she is sitting there waiting for you to take the lead, you are sitting there wasting time because you feel that’s a “woman” thing to do.

Start Saying Thank You

This is obvious, we give you a gift or say something nice, open your big, fat mouths and say thank you! It won’t hurt and we won’t read anything into that. Not saying thank you is just plain rude!

Blaming Our Moods On…

Yes, you guys constantly blame our monthly periods on our moods. Here’s a crazy concept, maybe I’m not in a bad mood, angry, or a bitch. Maybe I said it because it’s true and I meant it. Marinate on that.

Run!

You realize that you really like a girl and she really wants to be with you so what do you do? You run! How stupid, seriously! If you aren’t ready for that type of relationship, all you need to do is communicate that to her and ask to remain friends. If you really likes you, she’ll agree. Running is for fools.  Sticking your head in the sand might make you feel safer, but it’s not going to protect you from the coming storm.

You Are Not God’s Gift To Women

I repeat, you are NOT God’s gift to women, so calm down. Stop being overly cocky and over the top and just be your freaking selves! A real woman is NOT impressed with cars, how much money you have, how much weight you lost, the type of job you have, etc. We want you to have a job and be able to drive us on dates, but deep down, we don’t care about this stuff.

Pick Up The Damn Phone

Pick up the damn phone and call us back or text us back.  When you go cold-turkey on us and not respond that makes YOU look bad or you look like you are starving for attention. Again, it’s another way of you being rude, and by the way, this is not going to make us NOT like you anymore. It will just annoy the hell out of us.

Proposing To A Woman Just Because…

Why the hell would you want to get married if you don’t love her? This is a major epic fail because then you are stuck in a situation that you shouldn’t be in the first place.

Spying On Us

It amazes me how stupid you guys are sometimes! Facebook isn’t going to help you really get to know a woman. Granted yes you get to see their pics, and you get to see what hobbies and things they like to do, but if you judge a woman based on her Facebook account, then you are setting yourself up short & not being fair to her.

Being Gross

Talking with your mouth full and shoving food in your mouth, are just two of the ways that you guys gross us out.

Arguing Over Nothing

Yes, us women are guilty of nagging you. I get it. But you guys are guilty of starting fights over nothing.

Sending Mixed Signals

One minute you talk to us and flirt with us non-stop, the next minute you ignore us. Then you think you have a right to get angry when we do the same crap to you? If you want us but aren’t ready to be in a relationship, open your mouth and just tell us. If we really want to be with you, we will wait. If not, why keep us wondering and waste your time as well?

Wanting Sex And That’s It

Friends with Benefits never work, so why do you guys seriously think that if you just sex from us, that’s okay? I understand that you have needs, so do we, but if you date a woman for a while and spice things up in the bedroom, you’ll have the best of both worlds.

Bad Example

If you are single dad or a father from a previous relationship and have a daughter, let me warn you, that how you end up treating women will come back to haunt you. That’s how karma works.  Your daughter will either find a guy in which he treats her the same way you treat a woman or she won’t be able to trust a man because of the way you treat other women.

You Put Too Much Emphasis On Looks

I get it, you want a Barbie doll type girl. You know, the Victoria’s Secret type.  But remember, looks fade, personality doesn’t. Her mindset will raise your children, not her materialism, looks, or her body. Choose wisely!

Trying To Get Us Jealous As A Way To Communicate

Trying to see if a woman likes you or feels the same way about you by lying that you are in a relationship, flirting with other women in front of her, or just wording things in a certain way so you get a reaction out of us, isn’t going to get you the desired response. Instead, you are going to hurt her, and seriously I doubt that is the intention of most men.  I’ll fight for you but I will NEVER compete for you; there’s a difference.

Using Text To Have Serious Conversations:

Texting is good for those hi, how are you doing messages. Texting is NOT good to see where you stand with someone, break up with someone or even have a serious conversation about any situation you are going through.  People today have lost the true meaning of communication simply because using text is so impersonal and it doesn’t truly convey the message you really are sending. So before you decide to have a serious talk, save it for face to face and please put down the damn phone!

No one is perfect, I know that. And I am not saying that you guys need to do everything perfectly correct. But if we take a little time to actually THINK before we act or speak, we are not only thinking about ourselves but also remembering that HOW we approach situations affects others too. Your imperfections don’t define you. It’s how you handle them that makes you human.